“How are you feeling today?”
This is probably the most difficult question you can ask me.
When I first started therapy about 1.5 years ago, my therapist would ask me this question first, and I would freeze. I didn’t know the ‘correct’ answer. Do you actually respond with what you feel?
Because we have been trained in social settings to say, “Fine, I am doing good!” even if you have been hit by a tornado, slapped by a sloth, and buried under a bear.
And I have never been comfortable talking about ‘feelings,’ thinking that to do so would make me weak.
So, my therapist tried to ask me differently:
“How are we feeling today?” hoping that the ‘we’ would take some of the pressure off.
Maybe, that worked. Because I did start answering that question. Hesitantly. Shyly.
And it’s gotten easier since then to answer that question.
𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀 𝗶𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘄𝗲 𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲𝘀 𝗱𝗼𝗻’𝘁 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝗱𝗼 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺. We don’t know how to express them. And we don’t know how to handle the consequences of that expression.
In this lovely story, meant for children but applicable for adults, our feelings, all those big, huge, scary, small feelings, are laid bare.
And telling us gently that they all matter.
Meanwhile, how are 𝘆𝗼𝘂 feeling today? (Me? I am feeling a bit lost…)
𝘝𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘰 𝘤𝘰𝘱𝘺𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵: 𝘔𝘺 𝘉𝘦𝘥𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘚𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴